My neighbor is 51 years old and has been living alone for 12 years.

He paused.
“Imagine: you work, you pay the mortgage, you build a home. And one day you find out your wife is cheating on you. You get divorced… and she gets half of everything.”
“That’s how the law works…”
“Exactly. And then I ask myself: why take that risk again?”
He continued:
“Let’s say I meet a woman. We start living together, then we get married.” We buy a car, furniture, maybe another house. And in a few years, she decides to leave.
And then we have to divide everything again.
He shrugged.
“I’ve been through that once. I don’t need to repeat it.”
Second reason—men’s dreams rarely come to fruition.
Miguel poured himself some water.
“Now I have a little dream. I want to buy a vintage motorcycle. A BMW from the seventies. Restore it myself.”
“Sounds great.”
“Yes. I’ve been saving for a year. I think in about six months I’ll be able to afford it.”
He took a sip of water.
“When I was married, I had dreams too.”
He smiled somewhat ironically.
“Once I wanted to learn to play the guitar. I bought one and signed up for afternoon lessons. Patricia told me then:
‘What do you need that for? You’re forty years old. Are you going to become a rock star?'”
“I’m going to be a rock star?” In the end, I gave it up.
—Another time, I wanted to go kayaking with some friends in Baja California for a week. She said,
“We have a mortgage, and you want to play at being adventurous.”
So I gave up on that too.
He looked out the window.
—You eventually understand something: many women see men’s dreams as nonsense.
He smiled.
—Now I live alone. If I want to buy an old motorcycle and spend weekends in the garage, I just do it. Nobody tells me it’s a waste of time.
Third reason—expectations that are too high on dating apps
Miguel continued:
—A few years ago, I tried dating apps. Just out of curiosity.
—And how was it?
He smiled ironically.
—I talked to several women. One of them, Alejandra, was forty-six years old and worked as a receptionist at a beauty salon.
He paused.
— He wrote to me:
“You seem like an interesting man, but I’m looking for someone who earns at least 120 or 140 thousand pesos a month.”
I asked him:
“And how much do you earn?”
He replied:
“About 40 thousand.”
And that was the end of the conversation.
Miguel laughed.
“Luis, I’ve noticed something curious. Many women today consider themselves an extraordinary prize.”
He continued:
“They may live off rent and have a normal salary. But they’re looking for a man with a high income, their own home, a nice car, and total financial stability.”
“And what do they offer?”
He smiled.
“They usually say things like ‘femininity,’ ‘inspiration,’ or ‘feminine energy.’”
He looked at me.
“I earn about 80 thousand pesos a month. I have my own apartment and a car.”
But for someFor women, that’s still not enough.
He shrugged.
“If someone looks down on you from the start, why waste your time?”
Fourth reason — independence in everyday life
I asked him:
“But don’t you miss the feeling of home? Dinners together, caring for each other, being a couple?”
Miguel smiled.
“And who said a single man can’t have his own comfortable home?”
He gestured to the kitchen.
“I cook myself. I clean myself. The washing machine, the dishwasher, and the robot vacuum do half the work.”
He continued:
“When I was married, we argued constantly about little things. Who takes out the trash? Who cooks? Why things are out of place?”
He shrugged.
“Now my house is in order. Because everything depends on me.”

My neighbor is 51 years old and has been living alone for 12 years.
Yesterday I asked him why he doesn’t look for a partner…
He gave me 6 reasons that made me think.

Yesterday I went to my neighbor’s apartment to ask him for a drill.

Miguel opened the door wearing house pants and a simple t-shirt.

— Come in — she said. — I just finished dinner.

I went inside. The apartment was clean and tidy, and the smell of fried chicken with chili and spices wafted from the kitchen. There was a laptop on the table and, next to it, a glass of red wine.

Miguel is fifty-one years old.

He got divorced twelve years ago. Since then he has lived alone.

He works as an engineer and earns around 80,000 Mexican pesos a month .

We’ve known each other for about five years, since I moved into this building in Mexico City . And in all that time, I’ve never seen any other woman at his place. Not a steady partner, not even visitors.

He gave me the drill and then pulled out a bottle of tequila .

— Since you’re here, sit down. It’s been a while since we had a calm conversation.

We sat down in the kitchen and poured ourselves a glass.

After a while I asked him:

— Miguel, why do you live alone? Don’t you want to find someone?

He smiled slightly.

— I’m not looking for anyone in particular. You know, Luis , during these twelve years of living alone I’ve understood many things. And I’ve come to the conclusion that I live more peacefully this way.

– Because?

He poured a little more tequila and leaned back in his chair.

— I can give you six reasons. They’re not theories, they’re things I’ve experienced firsthand.

First reason — the economic risks of divorce

Miguel began to count.

— I got divorced twelve years ago. I was married to my ex-wife, Patricia , for eighteen years. We have a daughter; she’s twenty-eight now and lives on her own.

He took a sip.

— We separated because he was unfaithful to me. I discovered he was having an affair with a coworker. After that, I filed for divorce.

—And what happened next?

— The judge decided to divide the assets equally. We had to sell the apartment and split the money. Although I had paid most of the mortgage .

He looked at me.

— In practice, I lost half of what I had built over the years. Even though the reason for the divorce was his infidelity. Legally, everything was completely normal.

He paused.

— Imagine: you work, you pay the mortgage, you build a home. And one day you discover your wife is cheating on you. You get divorced… and she keeps half of everything.

— That’s how the law works…

— Exactly. And then I ask myself: why take that risk again?

Continuous:

— Let’s say I meet a woman. We start living together, then we get married. We buy a car, furniture, maybe another house. And after a few years she decides to leave.

And once again, everything has to be divided.

He shrugged.

— I’ve been through that once. I don’t need to repeat it.

Second reason — men’s dreams are rarely supported

Miguel poured himself some water.

— Now I have a little dream. I want to buy a vintage motorcycle. A BMW from the seventies . Restore it myself.

— That sounds great.

— Yes. I’ve been saving for a year. I think I’ll be able to afford it in about six months.

He drank some water.

— When I was married I also had dreams.

He smiled with a touch of irony.

— I once wanted to learn to play the guitar. I bought a guitar and signed up for afternoon lessons. Patricia told me then:

« Why do you need that? You’re forty years old. Are you going to become a rock star? »

In the end I quit.

— I wanted to go kayaking in Baja California with some friends for a week again . She said:

« We have a mortgage and you want to play at being adventurers. »

So I resigned too.

He looked out the window.

— Over time you understand something: many women see men’s dreams as nonsense.

She smiled.

— I live alone now. If I want to buy an old motorcycle and spend weekends in the garage, I just do it. Nobody tells me it’s a waste of time.

Third reason — expectations that are too high on dating apps

Miguel continued:

— I tried dating apps a few years ago. Just out of curiosity.

—And how was it?

He smiled ironically.

— I spoke with several women. One of them, Alejandra , was forty-six years old and worked as a receptionist in a beauty salon.

He paused.

— He wrote to me:

« You seem like an interesting man, but I’m looking for someone who earns at least 120 or 140 thousand pesos a month . »

I asked him:

« And how much do you earn? »

He replied:

« About 40,000 . »

And that’s where the conversation ended.

Miguel laughed.

— Luis, I’ve noticed something curious. Many women today consider themselves an extraordinary prize.

Continuous:

— They can live off rent and have a normal salary. But they’re looking for a man with a high income, his own home, a nice car, and complete financial stability.

—And what do they offer?

She smiled.

— They usually say things like « femininity », « inspiration » or « feminine energy ».

He looked at me.

— I earn about 80,000 pesos a month . I have my own apartment and a car.

But for some women, that’s still not enough.

He shrugged.

— If someone looks down on you from the start, why waste your time?

Fourth reason — independence in everyday life

I asked him:

— But don’t you miss the home atmosphere? Dinners together, caring for each other, life as a couple?

Miguel smiled.

—And who said a single man can’t have his own comfortable home?

He pointed to the kitchen.

— I cook myself. I clean myself. The washing machine, the dishwasher, and the robot vacuum do half the work.

Continuous:

— When I was married, we argued constantly about little things. Who takes out the trash. Who cooks. Why things are out of place.

He shrugged.

— Now my house is in order. Because everything depends on me.

See more on the next pa